Amsterdamned!

I want to tell you a story about tulips.

Once upon a time there was an old Dutch man who grew the most fabulous tulips. The other tulip growers were jealous of his abilities and of the fabulous tulips he grew and so they constantly pestered him for his secret.

After many years one of the other tulip growers, let's call him Frederick (although his name was Maximilian) decided to discover the secret of these masterful blooms for himself and so he followed the old man out to the tulip fields and watched what he did.

When the old man arrived at the fields he went into a rickety shed which was full of cages. The cages were all full of hamsters and the old man would pull out half a dozen of the fattest of these, stuff them in a blender and turn it on. After turning the defenceless little rodents into puree he would take the resulting gloop and spread it on the tulip fields.

The horrified Frederick witnessed all this and ran back to the other tulip growers to report.

"What is the old man's secret?" they asked Frederick "Why are his tulips so great".

Frederick replied "I'm afraid that the tulips we grow will never compare with his, because his tulips come from Hamster-Jam!"

(roll of drums and strike on the cymbal)

All of which is a very drawn out way of saying that Blessedarethegeek and Tallulah have just returned from a week in the beautiful city of Amsterdam.

More on this in the next post.

(and can I take this opportunity to say that recently a lot of people in what we term consensus reality have mentioned that they read this blog - the fools - but don't ever post comment. To these people I say: please do comment, even if it's to say that the blog is rubbish. Obviously I can't take criticism or anything, but you should know this by now).