Think of me, gentle reader as I type this. I am currently typing this by the light of a mobile phone as the light bulb in the computer room (okay, the spare room) does not seem to want to stay in the light fitting...
...No, really. I've tried three times and each and every time the light bulb has spent 45 seconds in the fitting before essaying a ricochet across the room. As Oscar Wilde put it "to have one bulb ricochet is unfortunate, two is mere carelessness and three is a subtle hint to fix your light fitting".
(This is one of Wilde's less well known sayings and generally gets left out of Wilde's complete works because of it's obscure nature. Wilde himself put it down to some dodgy asparagus he ate in Cambridgeshire).
As I write this I wonder whether this bulb activity is actually the result of some form of supernatural force trying to stop me writing this blog. In which case I would like to take this opportunity to say something to the supernatural world in general:
"GROW UP AND BEHAVE"
Yes, you might think it very clever to possess young girls, expelling ectoplasm from their nostrils and throwing chairs about the room but this kind of behaviour is simply not acceptable any more. Don't get me started on the atrocious spelling one finds when using a Ouija board these days.....
If you find yourself bound by death to walk a lonely road as one of the undead then why not read a good book, take a brisk walk or take up macrame?
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2 comments:
hmm. more craft-hints here. methinks you have a secret needlework need.
What annoys me about the supernatural as that they seem to exercise some sort of weird power over teenagers. The result is that they INSIST on going down into dark basements and ALWAYS think splitting the group up is a good way to search in the middle of a creepy forest with a history of gore. AND WHY - WHY- do people never realise that a murdering, mental, supernatural villain is NOT GOING TO DIE THE FIRST TIME HE/SHE/IT IS HIT ON THE HEAD/RUN OVER/BOMBED/KNIFED/ETC/ETC. it's guaranteed to come back to life the second your back is turned.
Sorry...I get a bit miffed with the supernatural genre when it makes people be unbelievably stupid. Who, I ask you, goes into a dark cellar in a creepy house in a dodgy forest and doesn't at least TRY TO PUT THE BLOODY LIGHT ON?
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