Happy New Blog!

Well hello there again - I hope that you all had a very merry irrelevant midwinter festival of your choice and a happy new arbitrary mathematical adjustment of the date was had by all.

(There, that should appease everybody)

Me?... well thank you for asking. I made two noteworthy achievements during this festive period - spent with Tallulah's family in Scotland.

FIRSTLY (once more I run the risk of appearing twee) I visited a pantomime for the first time in over 25 years. A Scottish pantomime no less - 'Cinderella' in Edinburgh - and I have to say that it was a far classier event than anything you'd encounter in England.

English pantomimes have been in decline for a long time now and seem to exist in order to give desperate soap actors something to do at when they've been written out of a series (or give a change of scenery to still-popular soap stars whose characters mysteriously disappear to Manchester/Benidorm/Brigadoon/Mars for three months). The posters for English pantomimes are particularly awful - they seem as tired and desperate as the performers.

Anyway - THIS pantomime was silly and stupid and joyous and fun. There were live animals (which, disappointingly, did not defecate at any point), the odd risque joke, lots of slapstick humour, and even some unintentional merriment when Little Red Riding Hood fell over and had to be helped up by Cinderella's dad! Can't wait to go again.

(The one moment of cynical terror I experienced was when an obviously very middle class toddler - called Skye - was taken up on stage and used her fairy princess powers to make it snow. I can't help thinking that some very expensive therapy lies ahead for this child).

The SECOND noteworthy event was that at a Scottish New Year's party I was persuaded to conquer the icy fear which clutches my bowels and get up and attempt Scottish dancing again and I WASN'T THE WORST AT IT.

(As I write this I realise that the Scots, Irish and Welsh have always try to get me involved in their traditional music or dance but NOT ONCE has a fellow Englishman pressured me into trying Morris Dancing).

In any case, this was something of a breakthrough for me. My previous attempts at Scottish dancing have resulted in white sergeant's which are particularly undashing - not to mention my gordon's, which are quite resolutely heterosexual.

More soon.