I'm told it's summer, but....

Greetings faithful reader.

Having been unceremoniously ejected from the not-yet marital bed for taking up too much room (I think that it's perfectly acceptable to emulate a starfish when asleep, don't you?). I thought I'd come and blog a bit.

I don't know what the weather is like in your part of the world but excepting yesterday it's been cold and wet, wet, wet for a week now. And not in a "love is all around" type fashion.

Our water feature was turned into a bog garden at great effort from myself and Tallulah using a big pile of dirt at the bottom of the garden. I was personally hoping to find a body there as the police would presumably have a better chance of tracking down the houses' previous tenants and at some point during the trial I could have raised the question of the cracks in the water feature as they were led away to jail.

The Big Brother avoidance has gone well - I've not watched any of it yet. It's particularly easy to avoid this year as the producers seem to have simply chosen tabloid fodder (I know you won't believe me when I say this, but this wasn't always so - up until the end of series 4 they would put some relatively intelligent people in but the producers found that the lack of idiots was affecting their cash cow).

I have, however, been watching the Apprentice and I have to say that I was shocked at the result. How a goggle-eyed upper class twerp that rents out rooms and lighting equipment to schools and who freezes with fear every five minutes is a better candidate than a hardworking sales manager and single mother I don't understand. I can only assume that Sir Alan needs someone who can speak toff.

Spanglepuss has been kind enough to send me a photograph of a historic condom which she wants me to post, so here it is: http://www.sciencemuseum.org.uk/objects/obstetrics_gynaecology_and_contraception/1989-865.aspx . I'm not sure why I've been sent this and I'm slightly concerned because another faithful reader has sent me a photograph of her (Spanglepuss's) boyfriend's bottom. Is there some kind of message here - a test for a newly engaged man to gauge his gay percentage?

If you're really interested I'd say that my gay percentage is about 20% raising to near 40% if I've been listening to a Russell T Davies podcast as that tends to make me slightly camp and welsh for a few hours (my Welsh percentage is normally about 25% but can peak at 50% in times of stress).

Ten ten till meet again.